It's a new Hospital !

Back to that ultrasound...

I did try to enjoy having a young woman examining my testicles. But she was far too professional. Friendly, though. Studying part-time by correspondence from UniSA, working full-time at Charlies.

I brought the conversation round to ultrasounds being associated with pregnancy. All so that I could add, Well, this time I won't be asking, is it a boy or a girl... Yes, that's an old line, she replied. Sigh... a wasted clever line.

Turns out that the "urologist" was, in fact, the doctor doing ward rounds. "The" urologist turned up and gave me -- again -- the rubber glove treatment. I'm not sure of the findings... Later comments seem to indicate that yes, there is a prostate lump and no, there is not. Still, everyone agrees that there are odd lumps throughout the right testicle. So there will be samples taken. Eventually.

One suggestion had been, knock me out once and work on both ends. Mr Lam -- the neurologist -- says that he wants me lying on my stomach whereas the urologist will want me lying on my back. So it seems I'm up for multiple visits to an operating theatre.

Have I mentioned timing? I can have my head opened tomorrow (Thursday) at St John of God Subiaco, or perhaps next Wednesday if I stay at SCGH. At this point Deb took charge... I will  become a private patient at SJoG. I'm happy either way though I'd rather get on with it. Deb is more worried about me and wanting to get me fixed. I've been sleeping like a log, the only restless time was half an hour last night when I missed Deb :-(

I've been well looked after with family visits: Deb, Tim, Robbie, Gaye. Even Gaye's boss dropped by -- the neurosurgeon -- with reassuring words, which was very nice of him. I'm barely worried because, well, what can I do anyway?!

So all was arranged to transfer me to SJoG. Deb went home. Went for a run round the lake to burn off some stress. I read, emailed -- it helps to spread the news around... Helps me, anyway :-) Waited. Said goodbye to Nick's mother. Had dinner at Charlies. Was half way through dinner when the ambulance men arrived. They waited while I finished dinner.

I know that I arrived at Charlies by ambulance. The trip to St Johns is the first ambulance trip that I remember. But they wouldn't turn on the siren for me.

And now I'm at St Johns.

It's very nice. Though I actually prefer a hospital that looks a bit stark and sterile, like a health centre rather than a hotel. Not that I'm complaining :-)  Though my mind keeps going ka-ching, like a cash register totting up the bill...

I'm in a private room. I've scored a couple of cups of tea, sweet biscuits, cheese and crackers. Crackers not as good as at SCGH.

I've peed in a cup. Had my finger pricked. Had blood samples taken from my arm, heart rate graphed. The graph started as a sine curve, some connections must have been loose. I've told people my name, date of birth, today's date, etc. Couldn't remember the name of Australia's Prime Minister -- that's a new question -- but I could remember the US President... Good enough.

Asked to squeeze, push, pull, arms and legs. When the doc tapped my knees there was no reflex. Everything else seems okay. Or, at least, no-one complained to me...

Mr Lam -- the neurosurgeon -- arrived just as Deb arrived. Just as well, I tend to answer questions then forget what was said.

The plan is -- tomorrow, probably late afternoon -- I'll have a circle of scalp cut up then a hole drilled in the bone of the skull. A hole about big enough to push a finger through. Lam will remove the lump, the tumour. A "tumour" is any lump. It'll take a week of testing to decide if I need to be scared with the word "cancer".

So tomorrow is removing the known lump. It may be more or less than seen on scans, depending on what is actually there. If lab analysis shows aggressive growth -- ie cancer -- then I'll be back (I guess) for more. That is, for more removal of lumpy brain.

According to Lam, this bit of brain -- right parietal lobe -- controls knowledge of where things are in space, around me. So I may lose some fine motor ability. Doing up buttons, for example. Or worse, I guess, if he takes out more brain! I'll worry about that if it happens... Or I won't worry, if he removes the bits of brain that worry :-)

The anaesthetist also came by. I've had anaesthetic for tooth implants but not a full knock-out mix. So there are risks... but I'm happy, I'm in a hospital... Surrounded by experts. Happy? Well, avoiding major panic, anyway.

I've been using the tablet and hotspot to sort out a few things. Getting supportive messages from the more distant family. (We're spread around Australia.) That's all nice :-)

Also exchanging a few messages with rental managers, making sure all is under control. And suggesting that the next rogaines get just an e-message and a short letter for the 100 or so who get hardcopy newsletters. With an apology and a promise of a "real" newsletter, later. I'm glad I depend on email, it would be a pain to make a lot of phone calls.

My check-in nurse has knocked off for the night, the night nurse will be by, sometime. It's after 10:30pm, I may just go to sleep.... Not sure why... I'll be sleeping for most of tomorrow !

I'm not worried. A tiny bit nervous, perhaps. More interested in a brand new experience. I fully expect to live through it... As I see it the worst possible result would be that my brain loses function. I've often thought that my life would be a lot simpler if my brain were a lot simpler :-)

I worry more about Deb. Whether I recover fully or not, Deb is being stressed. I don't like that. I love you, Deb :-)

Not to worry. I know the kids will look after Deb till I'm back to cause my usual chaos, confusion and stress...

Love to all !

 Tomorrow my head will be opened for inspection... Hope there's a brain in there.

Now I've met the night nurse. Scored more tea and biscuits before the midnight fast begins. More tea? I'm not particularly thirsty but the urine sample was darker than usual. Enough of the standard hospital topics! Time to eat, drink and... sleep.

Till tomorrow.

====
Dr Nick Lethbridge / Consulting Dexitroboper
Agamedes Consulting / Problems? Solved.
====

"Wow, I never thought of it like that before." … Joan D. Vinge