Today I visit the GP. (It seems traditional to say, "my GP". It's always the same GP but I don't own her.) I'm there to say hello, as much as anything. It's good to talk with a doctor who has an interest in more than cancer.
First, we look at the report on my ... no, I've already forgotten the word. (A subconscious but deliberate forgetting, I suspect.) Aha! Penile biopsy! Now I'll try to forget it again.
On the phone the dick doc had told me, (a) it's not cancer. (b) Some experts think it could possibly be [some technical medical jargon]. The dick doc says if it were that then (I paraphrase) I would have a host of pustulating buboes. None of them, so, probably not that.
Today the GP reads the report. Doesn't say much, does it? she comments. But, having guessed at a set of multiple initials, it seems to be inflammation of unknown origin. (Idiopathic. ie Nobody knows.) If it gets worse, she says, We'll try some more steroid cream.
I'm not an easy patient. I don't believe in having obvious symptoms which can lead to a clear diagnosis :-)
What about my shaky hands? I ask. I support this with a reference to Blazing Saddles. The GP asks a few questions. Gets me to tap my finger here, there, somewhere else. Not Parkinson's, then, she says. Don't worry unless it gets worse, she says.
Every disease I have is, Don't worry unless it gets worse. Which is fine by me.
My main reason for this visit is, to tell the GP that she's a great doctor. It worries her when I joke about dying. She thinks I could hate her for not diagnosing my brain cancer. (Really.) I had been in to have my heart checked, I had no symptoms of anything, especially not of a brain tumour.
I tell her that she's a great doctor. That visiting her is good value for me. All is good. Then because it's been a while since the last... she sends me to have a blood sample taken. Sheesh!
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Later in the day I go to the dentist. I was due for a tooth clean. Instead, I'm here because a tooth snapped off. When I say "tooth" I mean, a crown on a blob of amalgam on the remaining base of a tooth. It's no trouble, I've been eating on the stump.
The dentist smooths the stump and tops it with a smooth surface of putty (or something). The alternative is... much more complicated. I'm happy.
Best of all: The dentist says, see you in another six months... forgetting that I was going to have a clean and polish. So ha! a bonus :-)
Anyway, I claim that my teeth are a lot cleaner than they were a few years back. I've finally developed a tooth-cleaning process that works, largely by ignoring the advice of dentists. On a previous visit the dentist was surprised by how clean my teeth were. So, another ha!
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Meanwhile, I'm staying cheerful by keeping busy. Busy at things I enjoy, that is, otherwise it's just work. Not cancer-related but I'll blog them anyway. In a separate post...
Dr Nick Lethbridge / Consulting Dexitroboper
... Agamedes Consulting / Problems ? Solved
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I'd rather be super rich than completely stupid... Ginger Meggs
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Dying for you to read my blog, at https: // notdotdeaddotyet .blogspot. com. au/ :-)
