stable and boring

latest scan results: my brain is stable and boring :-)

Boring because there is very little change -- and that is good. And stable is good because, well, it's not getting worse.

The scan shows roughly the same necrosis but no tumour.

The cancer doc is happy to wait four months till the next scan. The next scan will still include the extra bit (perfusion?) that helps distinguish necrosis from tumour. So, still wary.

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I think the theme of this blog is about to shift again. Travel, cancer, travel... Now I may as well admit that I'm getting older. With all the problems of aging :-) Okay, aging and with dodgy vision.

I'm in a strange cafe having coffee with a friend. I need, no surprise, a toilet.

It takes me several attempts and repeated directions to get out the back of the cafe to the toilet.

Then I can't find my way back. Eventually I go out a side door, follow the building round the outside and re-enter the cafe by the front door.

The friend and I are jointly setting a rogaine... We need to locate 60-plus points on a map. I can't even find my way back into a cafe... Creating the map may be a challenge.

Cancer is (luckily) getting boring. Travel does not happen everyday. But growing old... I do like to analyse (and document) life's little challenges. So age that may provide material for several prolix postings. And writing it down will save me from having to think about it :-)

Dr Nick Lethbridge / Consulting Dexitroboper

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The stupid person says, "It's impossible". The smart person says, "It's possible, if we can get enough stupid people to do it." (Alfred E. Neuman)

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waiting on results

My brain was scanned this week. No results yet.

Our usual informant is not a brain specialist. He has seen the picture but the specialist has not yet provided interpretation. So our man says, he can't make head nor tail of it.

Which raises the question... Is he holding the picture upside down?

rofl... All this post, just so that I could use that punchline :-) hehehe

. 

Dr Nick Lethbridge / Consulting Dexitroboper

==

The stupid person says, "It's impossible". The smart person says, "It's possible, if we can get enough stupid people to do it." (Alfred E. Neuman)

pwMapAppreadMe)

dreaming not driving

Back home, back to the brain scans. That's yesterday. We won't know results for a week.

It's become sort of ordinary. Okay, I do feel a bit worried. I shout, I swear, I'm easily annoyed when I can't do something. In fact. I'm just as usual.

Have I reached the final stage of dealing with grief? ... acceptance?

When I reached 70 I thought, that's quite old. At my age there are all sorts of things which can kill me. There's no need to worry over the one at the head of the queue.

A few days ago, I'm going round the lake. I've had my heart and lungs tested, both seem okay (though the lungs have occasional limited capacity for no obvious reason. I think I do need to exercise both heart and lungs. Perhaps push a little harder.

A month ago I ran at a consistent 111 bpm (oh, the fun of a GPS watch, I can see my heart rate :-) 

So this time I push a bit harder, just a bit. Enough to get my heart ticking at 120bpm. or thereabouts. I'm still moving slowly, it's 90 mins to get round the lake.But I feel that it's good exercise, for the heart and possibly for the lungs.

Won't I feel silly if my heart fails :-)

Last weekend we went orienteering. Deb's sister went with us. The sister and I did a VE course, I followed. It was good to be out and about. Even following fences... I was mostly confused.

It was good for us and allowed Deb to do a Medium course by herself. And I had the pleasure of following an attractive but different woman :-)

Tonight we are back from seeing lights in Kings Park. I can't remember the name, a display of coloured flashing lights decorating the park. Very impressive. Both better and worse than I expected.

It's cold but pleasant, no wind, only a sprinkle of rain.

All I do is follow Deb. I watch my feet, the path is level, it's other people that I worry about. When someone stops in front of me I wait, I can't see where to go to pass them.

The light show is impressive but wasted on me. I watch my feet, if I look at lights to the side, I start to lose the path. So I don't fully appreciate the patterns of the lights.

It's a bit like walking through a showroom full of TVs, lots of light, little sense.

So it's somewhat wasted on me... but it's an enjoyable experience.

====

I'm using yet another device to type this post. It's a laptop. Windows based, so familiar. With a real keyboard.

It's not perfect. A bit big, for one thing. It takes a while to get some things working... working as I want them, that is.

So far, I have *not* had any urge to throw it in the bin. So that's a huge improvement on the apple tablet :-)

====

 

I claim that this latest scan does not really worry me.

And yet... I'm up late. Restless. Tired but doing this and that, rather than going to bed. It's what I do when I'm worried about something. I stay up late and do some of the things which I otherwise would worry about. Reducing the worry load :-)

After all, who needs sleep...

====

When I sleep I dream. Some, I remember.

It's fun trying to understand what influences a dream. Sometimes it's a book that I'm reading that gets warped into a dream.

Quite often it's something that affects me when I'm awake, I deal with or act on it in a dream.

One time, I wake up with the clear impression of a stranger in our bedroom. It only takes seconds to identify it as a dream, a nightmare. It takes longer to get over the fright. Lucky I don't have many nightmares.

I dream that we're in the truck. Deb driving. This dream is from me wanting to drive but I can't. Then the dream abandons reality...

The truck is being controlled from outside. By a cat... I use the torch app on my phone to see the cat. Dreams reflect but abandon reality. In reality, I have never been able to find that torch app when I need it.

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Speaking of not driving...

I am blind to my left. So Deb won't let me drive.

In SA a man was driving with the same blindness as mine, he hit and killed a cyclist.

In WA cyclists owe a debt of gratitude to Deb. I complain but I won't drive.

.

Dr Nick Lethbridge / Consulting Dexitroboper

===

The stupid person says, "It's impossible". The smart person says, "It's possible, if we can get enough stupid people to do it." (Alfred E. Neuman)

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City visit

tonight we have to make a quick visit to the city. it's both exciting and annoying.

exciting because we don't often go out at night. The city lights are exciting. Even the suburban lights are new, to us, and exciting.

Annoying because it reminds me that I cannot drive.

Deb could relax at home while I do the quick drive but... no. Deb has to drive. very annoying.

So I will never again be able to drive? Pretty minor problem, really:-) It could be a lot worse!

.

--

Dr Nick Lethbridge / Consulting Dexitroboper
...

===

If everyone is thinking the same way, then someone is not thinking.

GPS navigation

The comment is made, "How did we get by without GPS"

I can answer that because Deb and I discuss it.

I drove. Deb as passenger will navigate.

Deb uses a *paper* map, book or sheet.

Deb will know where to go, she will guide me. And follow our progress on her map.

One big advantage is -- we (Deb) always knows where we were and where we are going. With the GPS we are travelling essentially blind, only knowing as far as the next change of direction. Also, Deb as navigator can quickly suggest a change of route.

The GPS adds the ability to know *exactly* where we are -- Deb still likes to follow the map -- and decide if there is a more interesting way, or diversion.

Of course the *dis* advantage, before GPS, is that we get lost. Which is not a major problem when we are on holiday. Getting lost adds new scenery to a new trip :-)

With the GPS we barely consider where we will go. We lose a lot of the "excitement" of suddenly deciding to go somewhere else.

And when we get "there" -- we (or I, even as driver) barely know where we have been.

Non-GPS driving requires a lot more "involvement" of the driver, and passenger, with the environment.

GPS means, getting "there" directly and on time :-)

... with minimum involvement with the holiday touring.

Dr Nick Lethbridge / Consulting Dexitroboper

===

The stupid person says, "It's impossible". The smart person says, "It's possible, if we can get enough stupid people to do it." (Alfred E. Neuman)

pwMapAppreadMe)

another good birthday

yesterday:

I used to be quite casual about flu vaccination. Now with young grandchildren and a strict daughter... I'm a regular pincushion.

Deb and I go to the doc for this year's flu jab.

Be brave, the doc tells me. I grimace, stare at the ceiling and mutter, I hope I get a sweetie for this.

The doc leaves us with the nurse. As she leaves the doc tells the nurse, Give him a lolly.

Really? asks the nurse.

Oh yes please, I say.

The nurse jabs. Then gives me *two*jellybeans:-)

I don't really mind injections. But I do like the doctor, she understands me.

today:

My arm has a bit of an ache from the jab. So does Deb's arm. It's okay, we're brave:-)

Today is my birthday. Various people email birthday wishes:-)

Deb and I go to Floreat Kiosk for birthday brunch. It's our favourite cafe. On the edge of the beach. Today we have a fine view of the rain. Which reminds me...

I make some comment to Deb about our holiday. No, she corrects me, there were some problems.

Oh yes.

I think about it and remember me complaining. And other holidays, I can remember days when we walked in pouring rain and a howling gale. But.

If you ask me about any holiday, all I remember is the sun shining. flowers blooming. birds singing, in the trees. Until I remember specific days...

In my memory every holiday is, once past, an excellent holiday. Though I may, with effort, remember some days which were less than perfect.

So, no use asking me how it went, it was always excellent :-)

====

Late afternoon and I have barely budged from the couch.

The sun is shining...I grab my white stick and head off around the lake.

What is white and sticky:-?

All the way round, I am happily humming the Hey Duggee Stick Song. I love it. Interesting...I have already forgotten the words.

Having accepted that distance is best measured by the time it takes to get there... I moved 90 minutes. Slowly. Feel better for having moved at all. All it takes is, doing,*something*

Better yet, our hot water is fixed. I come home to a hwarm shower. A shower. At last.

.

--

Dr Nick Lethbridge / Consulting Dexitroboper
...

===

If everyone is thinking the same way, then someone is not thinking.

home and chaos

When you want to know how far you are from another place, the most meaningful measure is, time. As in, it's so far away that it would take me an hour to walk there.

By that measure, around the lake is ten percent further than it was a month ago.

The temperature is bitterly cold, as it was in England. The rain has passed over, there is a dry patch. The day is overcast but bright. I have no excuse.

I go round the lake. Eight slow km. Not so much a training run. More a staving off of the inevitable decline.

Once started, it's warm enough. That's the beauty of our climate, it's never too cold to run in shorts and tee shirt.

We've come home from English summer to Perth winter and the weather is much the same.

It's good to be out and about.

Near the end of the loop is a large pile of sand. Perhaps twenty metres high, something to do with future road building.

It's a good marker, when I see it I know I'm almost finished.

Except that today I run on past it. A combination of not thinking, and the blasted thing is on my left. Invisible.

We're home to chaos. A favourite aunt is sick. Luckily she recently got a mobile phone because she's not at home to answer her home phone.

We're barely home when the grandkids stay overnight. Deb does most of the looking after, I shelter behind the couch.

Today, our hot water fails. Deb has a very quick cold shower. I boil a kettle and use a sponge.

I have a surprising number off photos to sort through. Deb points out that a lot of them include a thumb. She's right... even now I don't immediately see the thumb--on the left of the picture. dratted blind side.

Deb's phone has a UK Sim, it works in England but not here. What happened to the Australian Sim?

Deb goes to a "phone ninja". He opens the phone and... the Sim is stuck on the inside back.

A good place for it. If we had known. If replacing a Sim was something we could do by ourselves.

All fixed and working now.

End of chaos. I hope :-)

.

--

Dr Nick Lethbridge / Consulting Dexitroboper
...

===

If everyone is thinking the same way, then someone is not thinking.

Home again, all good

Deb appreciated the extra leg room of premium economy, so that's good :-)

As for me, I can barely remember the flight before. Even though I did plan to compare the two (premium vs ordinary). I live in today, the past is a foreign country.

As we are landing I have this clear image, an elephant coming in to land. The plane is surely too large to fly. But it does, and it lands.

As usual we have a short delay on entry. We insist on walking across farm fields. Our boots look clean but they are taken to be disinfected,a short delay.

I wonder about the sniffer dogs. We don't have food or drugs. But my well worn clothes, they may want to roll in it.

But no worries... we are through.

Our sons phone. Are we expecting one of them to pick us up? No, Deb's sister is here waiting. Always nice to return home to a friendly face:-)

She asks, was there a highlight? Not really. It was an overall good holiday. Lots of things we enjoyed, England in Spring. Various major events add to the... ambience.

A good mix of locations and accommodation. An overall enjoyable holiday.

And we're home. Back to the old familiar sights and sounds and smells. What is that smell? just a stuffy house.

Back to an orange tree covered in several weeks worth of fresh squeezed orange juice. And, for me, three loads of dirty washing. Mostly Deb's clothes, I wear mine till they walk away.

====

A quick trip to buy some food.

i sleep.

Deb cooks dinner, we eat.

i sleep.

even Deb sleeps twelve hours, getting our clocks adjusted.

now, we're home.

phew!

--

Dr Nick Lethbridge / Consulting Dexitroboper
...

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If everyone is thinking the same way, then someone is not thinking.

plane breakfast

bacon and eggs.

the eggs are scrambled, salty but otherwise okay.

four or so slices of bacon, there is no way i could cut them up on the tiny tray table,i just leave them.

theres a muffin. it's dry but edible,i eat a lot of it.

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i paid for premium economy. as far as i can tell, the premium means better crockery and cutlery.

though, yes, we do have decent leg room. for that, the premium oss worth paying. 

--

Dr Nick Lethbridge / Consulting Dexitroboper
...

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If everyone is thinking the same way, then someone is not thinking.