cause of death

that subject line is misleading

it should be *probable* cause of death.

...today there  is some very direct questioning of the cancer doc.  I don't want to be caught dead by surprise. 

===

yes, there is cancer in my brain stem. 

at the start of the current IV chemo, it shrank. 

as the IV continued,  the tumour has grown again. 

More of this chemo is *not* likely to stop tumour growth. 

there's a different IV drug that I could try. 

It is just as *un*likely to work.... the tumour will continue to grow. either drug is a real clutching at straws option. 

Or I could do nothing

... stop IV completely. 

... the tumour will continue to grow. 

three choices, each with the same -- probable -- result... a tumour which continues to grow. 

so what about the headaches which I'm warned about? simply a result of a growing tumour which is pushing the brain out of shape

... just another aspect of a growing tumour. 

no matter what I do, a growing tumour is the likely outcome. 

a growing tumour will slow me down, make me weaker.  until,  one day someone notices that I am so slow and weak that I am dead. 

I start today feeling very tired. very,  very tired. 

walking is an effort.  even standing still is tiring. this matches what I expect as I die of cancer in my brain stem. 

easy, slow, no timetable,  completely painless, very annoying. 

==

http://notdotdeaddotyet.blogspot.com
dying for you to read it :-)
...ranting  http://my3rs.blogspot.com

brain fading, typing blind
if this email is nonsense, pls guess or ask
ndependent Consulting dexitroboper