from icu to a ward

i go for a regular scan and am called back for immediate admission to hospital. when was that?!

the scan was Wednesday so i was in hospital by Wednesday evening. today is Saturday. now evening. so that's three days.

i remember patches. mostly, i sleep. some vague memories may be guesswork.

hospital air con is set to frigid. I'm sitting with acouple of blankets round my shoulders.

two days in icu. lots of people wanting to hold my hand... asking me to squeeze, push, pull. testing that my body stil  manages basic functions.

there are the bright lights in my eyes and questions such as, do you know where you are? what day it is.

i have a couple of visitors. im awake for some of them.

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back to a ward. again shared. with someone in worse condition than me, he is asked for his level of pain... seven. i reach a bare one, take a panadol... otherwise im sure deb will tell me off.

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the traditional look for a cancer patient is gaunt. i continue to gain weight. hospital food may change that.

my standard approach to food is, put it in front of me and ill eat it. now i just pick at food.

cant be bothered cutting so i eat the yoghurt and tinned fruit.

dinner may be beef bougignonne. meat which may have started as the farmers boots. button mushrooms which may have started as... buttons.

the meals may have been planned by a vegetarian dietition who doesnt really enjoy eating.

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in this new room i know there is a cupboard to my left. my phone tablet and book are there. i cant see to my left. with things hanging off me i dont like to turn and look.

finally i ask a nurse and am back in communication.

i aslo ask for the tissues which i guess are there. ive been blowing my nose on sheets or blankets. whatever comes to hand.

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i wake up, this morning? feeling a lot better. ready to... get ready... to go home.

the brain drains are removed. such a relief. i rub my head and feel the plastic bag of brai fluid... yuk. gone at last.

i celebrate by walking to the toilet. under careful escort. no real need, i still have a catheter and nothing else is moving. it feels so good to have walked... even with a zimmer frame. freedom! :-)

Nick Lethbridge    /    Consulting Dexitroboper
Agamedes Consulting    /   Problems? Solved.
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One, be a good person; two, have fun; three, be happy; four, show respect and be respected; and then number five was, if you can play tennis after that, it's an added bonus."... Ash Barty's first coach