sadness -- passed

Friday evening I have my longest and saddest time for months. I am exhausted, I am uncertain -- I am very happy... !?

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Friday morning begins, as ever, with a chemo tablet. I'm gradually learning to think "between meals" rather than "half hour before breakfast". Which means that I can get up, swallow a pill, go back to sleep.

Deb drops me at SJoG hospital then goes on to work. I have coffee, walk to Genesis for my radiation. Treatment is just as quick but a bit later than usual.

Genesis shifted treatments round for this Friday, to finish early. Seems there will be a visit by bigwigs so the clinic wants to make a good impression. That would explain the gardener over the last couple of days. I would have thought that even bigwigs would like to see the efficient treatment of patients. I guess that "patient informed consent" makes that difficult.

A walk, two trains & more walking, I'm visiting my brother at his office in East Perth. All very easy... public transport works well. (I won't mention the walking again. There is always some but it's no trouble. While the weather is good :-)

The building concierge asks me, Do you work here? are you visiting here? He's with a different government agency so I say, No, no. I probably look extra suspicious as I bypass the concierge and head to the toilets....

Which I do again, after coffee with my brother. Again, past a suspicious concierge :-)

An easy bus ride to the city centre. Time for a snack and some reading (I take a book for public transport trips). Then lunch with Andrew. We swap yarns on running... he's still improving while I'm... well... possibly past my peak :-)

Bus home... and I'm exhausted! Catch a few minutes sleep before Deb gets home. Son drops by to drop off a novel for me to read -- one that he has written! Dinner... then babysitting.

Deb & I look after Will for the evening. I'm no longer asleep on my feet but definitely relaxed. Will entertains us for a few hours then is glad to be able to relax when his mother gets home!

Back home -- after a hour or two to unwind -- I go to bed. Look at Deb asleep already. Think, All this is soooo nice... I'd like it to last a lot longer. And I'm hit by sadness :-( Just three on a scale of one to ten. But definitely sad.

I think it through:

I'm happy and I would like it to last forever. Right now I'm exhausted, feeling flat rather than cheerful. And yesterday's garden analogy is too good: I understand that I am in a period of uncertainty until my post chemoradiotherapy brain scan.

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I sleep. Wake up... it's now Saturday morning. Feeling rested.

Feeling better :-)

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Dr Nick Lethbridge / Consulting Dexitroboper
Agamedes Consulting / Problems ? Solved
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​"No one said they wanted faster horses, they wanted less horseshit." … no, not said by Henry Ford

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Now much more than a clever name for a holiday journal:

 https://notdotdeaddotyet.blogspot.com.au/  :-)